‘It softens the edges’: B.C. man inspired by regular visits to late friend’s bench

Adam finds out why a man is visiting baby birds and one particular bench.

VICTORIA – While the baby birds exploring the park don’t seem to have a care in the world, the same couldn’t always be said for the man watching them.

“I was thinking about what I have to do today, what I have to do tomorrow,” Allan says. “Worried about politics, worried about the news.”

The sorts of things Allan would joke and debate about with his friends

“Our main thing was to have grumpy-old-men lunches,” Allan laughs.

Yet today, he’s watching a gaggle of goslings indulge in their lunch.

“Being in nature softens the edges,” Allan says.

Like sandpaper can smooth the roughest wood, downy birds seem to have the power to soften the toughest people.

“It takes the edges off,” Allan smiles.

Which is why Allan started to stop at parks like this.

“It’s just a way of clearing my mind,” Allan says.

Which can make room to see all sorts of things, including this new feathered family, differently than we did.

“It’s the cycle of life seeing animals in nature,” Allan says. “As well as you deal with your own mortality.”

And that’s why, after appreciating the birds, Allan will wander over to another area in the park to visit a bench overlooking the ocean. It’s dedicated to his late friend Jack, who was possibly grumpy but definitely grateful and gracious.

“I learned from him to be more tolerant,” Allan says while sitting next to the bench. “And to listen to people and just accept the way they are.”

And instead of feeling overwhelmed by the politics that divide us, or the news that worries us, these moments have taught Allan to focus on what connects and comforts us.

“Take care of each other,” Allan says. “Be aware of your friends and your family and your community and do what you can.”

And on this journey — from the beginning of life to the inevitable end of it — take the time to relish every moment in between.