Sudbury transgender advocate recalls difficult journey

After a suicide attempt, Vincent Bolt’s family realized acceptance was vital. Now a psychotherapist, his advocacy for the trans community is driven by his past.

Reader advisory: This story deals with suicidal ideation.

For almost 20 years, Vincent Bolt has used he/him pronouns. In the early 2000s, he was around 14 years old when he realized the gender assigned at birth was not the one he identified with.

“At that time, we had no local resources specifically for trans people,” Bolt said.

“So it was a lot of me finding books at the library, Googling information and trying to find clues (about) what do I do next?”

He came out as transgender while still in high school. Bolt said initially, his family was not supportive, but following a suicide attempt that landed him in the hospital, they changed their perspective.

“They realized … if they didn’t accept me fully, they would lose me entirely,” he said.

“Like, it became clear -- ‘We would rather our kid be trans than dead.’”

Bolt said there was a lot of learning in those first few years for everyone in his world. That included at his high school, medical professionals and others, all learning to navigate transgenderism.

Treated poorly

Due to a lack of awareness, Bolt said he experienced mistreatment.

“People who would misgender me, being treated poorly when I was in the hospital, being bullied by nurses and even having to just give a basic ‘Trans 101’ to service providers. They had no idea,” he said.

It was these experiences that motivated him to get involved in advocacy -- and to tell his story.

“Out of desperation for creating a better world for myself and friends who were starting to come out, I needed to do something,” he said.

“I could either sit on my butt and do nothing, I could let it destroy me, or I could become an activist.”

Bolt found a small transgender community and they became each other’s support.

“It was just me and older trans women. So, here I am, 17 years old, 18 years old, sitting in a boardroom … learning about wigs and makeup and tucking, but at least I felt like here is a space where I belong,” he said.

Shared experience

Those early years shaped his career. Bolt is now a psychotherapist. Many of his clients identify as transgender or queer. He said they seek his help because of their shared experience.

“I know how to navigate the system because I’ve been through it,” he said.

“When a client is like ‘I don’t know what to expect after top surgery,’ I can say, ‘Well, been there, done that, here’s what you can expect.’”

Nov. 20 is Transgender Day of Remembrance. The day honours transgender individuals who’ve been murdered, died suspiciously or died by suicide. Each year, new names are added.

Bolt said it’s a reminder of those who no longer have a voice.

“To see that some of these deaths are happening closer and closer to home tells me that we need more advocacy, we need more protections and we need a shift in attitudes in society still,” he said.

Despite the heightened political climate, particularly south of the border, Bolt said advocacy conquers fear.

As for what is still needed, Bolt said that’s a long list, but permanent funding for community support groups tops that list.

“For example, the TG Innerselves groups are running without funding right now, by really dedicated volunteers – and have been for the past few years,” he said.

“So, we need funders that will keep funding these programs. And it’s not just ... one-year grants or three-year grants. It needs to be permanent funding.”

A vigil is planned for Thursday evening at 6:30 at the Main branch of the Greater Sudbury Public Library to mark Transgender Day of Remembrance.