Calandra's Greatest Hits: Some of the Tory MP's notorious non-answers

OTTAWA -- Some of Paul Calandra's more puzzling responses to questions in the House of Commons:

In response to an NDP question about Canada's current mission in Iraq:

• "Mr. Speaker, what does the leader of the Opposition not understand? Our friends in Israel are on the front lines, combating terrorism."

In response to an NDP question about Nigel Wright:

• "I do like flowers and, of course, with lemons I like to make lemonade. My two daughters, this summer, actually had a lemonade stand where they sold lemonade for five cents on the street. They did very well. I am very proud of them."

In response to another question about the Senate expenses scandal:

• "I have two daughters, a seven-year-old and a five-year-old, two beautiful girls, Natalie and Olivia, and each week I give them an allowance. Part of that allowance might be for cleaning their rooms. Both Natalie and Olivia know that sometimes their mother might clean their rooms. They both know that they should not ask for an allowance because they did not actually do the work. If my five-year-old and seven-year-old can figure this out, how is it that these senators cannot figure it out and how is it that the opposition supports that type of activity from our senators?"

In response to a question about a former PMO staffer who left in the midst of the Senate expenses scandal:

• "My father owned a pizza store. He worked 16 to 18 hours a day. I can tell the House what my father would not have done if he saw somebody stealing from his cash register. He would not have said 'You are suspended, but make sure you come back every two weeks and collect a paycheque.' What he would have said, 'You're fired, leave,' and he would have called the police."