"The Twilight Saga: New Moon"

Richard's Review: 2 stars

I'm no sixteen-year-old girl. Never have been, never will be, which makes me unqualified to judge the appeal of the "Twilight" books and movies. These vampire love stories have hit a nerve with a certain demographic, made superstars out of its actors, the King and Queen of Mumbly Teen Angst, Robert Pattison and Kristen Stewart and made everyone connected with the series rich.

But I don't really get it. I'm no sixteen year old female, but neither is director Chris Weitz who I'm not sure really gets it either. He's taken a surefire hit and turned it into a plodding, dull movie that keeps the leading man hidden for half the film.

The story picks up where the original left off. Bella (Kristen Stewart) and vampire Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) are happily enjoying a dead-undead romance, exchanging long stares and even the occasional kiss. When a paper cut and a drop of blood ruins Bella's 18th birthday Edward realizes there is no place for a human in his world and breaks off their relationship before hightailing it to points unknown. In his absence Bella becomes an emotional wreck (nobody does tormented teen like Kristen Stewart). There are bad breakups -- the kind where you mope and eat ice cream for breakfast -- then there is the titanic meltdown that happens after Bella gets dumped by the bloodsucker.

Enter Jacob Black (Taylor Lautner), Bella's old friend and possible new love interest. By the time someone says to her, "you're OK with weird," the going truly has become bizarre. Jacob turns out to be a member of the mysterious Quileute tribe who carry a werewolf gene.

As everybody knows, werewolves and vampires don't get along, placing Bella in the awkward position of not only being involved in a vampire-werewolf-human love triangle, but also having the two men in her life be sworn enemies.

"New Moon" is bound to make a fortune, but it isn't an improvement on the first picture. It's slightly more stylish than the original and there are a few more light moments but the story is all melodrama and no real drama. The characters, which original director Catherine Hardwicke treated as real people, giving them heart and soul (of course vampires don't have heart or soul but you get the idea), here are simple stereotypes.

In Weitz's world Bella and Edward are reduced to lovesick ennui twins, moping endlessly and mumbling their lines. There are attempts to create a feeling of romance -- Edward even recites a passage from "Romeo and Juliet" from memory -- but what felt like a sweeping, all consuming love in the first film feels more like an overblown teenage crush in the new film.

Unlike the television series "True Blood," which manages to find a balance between the love story and the vampire action while throwing in a bit of social commentary, "New Moon" is content to present underdeveloped ideas about identity, racism and gay rights. All these concepts are buried in the script and if they weren't pumping these "Twilight" movies out faster than AIG wastes its bailout money the screenwriters might be able to develop some of these ideas beyond simply paying lip service to them with an anguished monologue by a jittery teen.

But what do I know? The audience I saw the film with cooed during all the right moments, laughed when Edward's brother suggested it would be a good idea for Bella to become a vampire so he wouldn't want to "kill her all the time" and gasped at the bombshell ending. "New Moon" will please the fans of the books and movies, but may leave non fang bangers cold.

"The Blind Side"

Richard's Review: 3 1/2 stars

"The Blind Side" is Sandra Bullock's third movie this year, following "The Proposal," a fun rom com that became her biggest hit to date and "All About Steve," a critical flop that nonetheless showed she can be charming despite a terrible script. This time around she brings a different set of acting chops to play Leigh Anne Tuohy, a big-hearted but tough-as-nails Memphis mom.

Based on a true story, "The Blind Side" centers on teenager Michael "Big Mike" Oher (Quinton Aaron), an inner city teen on his way to becoming a statistic. He's been tossed around from foster home to foster home, forgotten about and neglected.

After earning admission to a Christian private school based on his athletic ability, he still feels lost, a lone African-American in a sea of white faces. It isn't until he is spotted by a guardian angel in the form of Leigh Anne Tuohy that his life takes a dramatic left turn. After a chance meeting she realizes that he has no where to live and invites him to her family's home for the night. One night turns into a lifetime, as Michael becomes part of the family.

"The Blind Side" is a hokey movie. Most of the characters are stereotypes and the dramatic arc is so simple a five-year-old could see how this story is going to end up, but despite its Hallmark feel it's also a crowd pleasing four-Kleenex tear-jerker. It's a mix-and-match assortment of themes and styles--there's the fish-out-of-water story, the inspirational sports tale, a family drama and a study of race and class in America. Phew. There's a lot going on but Bullock and newcomer Quinton Aaron are the glue that hold it all together.

Bullock has transformed herself here. The cute and cuddly edge of her rom coms is gone, replaced with a mane of blonde hair and a take-no-prisoners attitude. Even her voice has a harder edge to it than usual. It's the kind of performance she's been hinting at ever since her dramatic turn in "Crash" and one that could earn her awards in the coming months.

As Big Mike, Quinton Aaron not only brings an imposing physicality to the role but also a tender side. He's a gentle giant with a warm smile who gets the audience on side with him from the get go. The whole story hinges on whether or not viewers care about Big Mike and will want to go on his life journey. Aaron wins us over early on and holds our attention in a quiet, understated performance.

"The Blind Side" isn't a great movie, there's too much emotional manipulation and huge problems seem to get solved a little too easily for it to be 100 per cent believable, but it is an entertaining movie anchored by two very good, but very different actors.

"Precious"

Richard's Review: 4 1/2 stars 

There is nothing precious about the movie "Precious". Nothing twee or frivolous. If the word "heartbreaking" hadn't already existed in the English language it might have been invented to describe the story of Clareece "Precious" Jones an inner city NYC kid with big problems.

"Precious" is about the power of the educational system to help lift a person up from adversity but it is much more than just an inspirational teacher movie. It's a movie about victims--one who transcends and one who doesn't. "To Sir with Love" this isn't.

Set in 1987 Harlem it follows the progress of "Precious" Jones, a pregnant, overweight and illiterate sixteen year old. She lives with her welfare mother Mary (Mo'Nique) in a rundown apartment where she lives a life of constant mental, physical and sexual abuse. "I'll be OK," says Precious. "I'm always looking up... looking for a piano to fall. There's always something in my way."

The only thing that keeps her on an even keel is her rich inner life, but even that is filled with self hate. When she looks in the mirror she imagines a skinny, pretty blonde girl staring back at her. Despite her big dreams she feels people regard her and her family as "black grease that needs to be wiped away."

The one bright spot in her life is Ms. Rain (Paula Patton) a supportive alternative school teacher. With her encouragement Precious may find a way out of her hellish situation.

"Precious" is one of the most gruelling movie experiences of the year. It transports the viewer to an uncomfortably down-and-dirty world were pain and anguish are the price of admission. Hope, for Precious, is a dim light at the end of a very long tunnel but director Lee Daniels keeps the movie from being an exercise in viewer self flagellation with pitch perfect (and unexpected) casting and a sure narrative hand.

Cast wise the most surprising element to "Precious" is a career making performance from comedian Mo'Nique in a decidedly non-comedic role. Best known for parts in low budget comedies like Soul Plane and Beerfest she shows a dramatic side here as Mary, a vicious mother and welfare scammer.

Who would have imagined her (potentially) Oscar worthy scene would be opposite Mariah Carey? Carey's work as a tough-as-nails social worker should erase all the ill will her "performance" in "Glitter" earned, and who knows, maybe she'll be able to add an acting prize to her Grammy shelf come awards time.

At the center of it all is first timer Gabourey "Gabby" Sidibe in the title role. She pulls off a difficult portrayal, making it believable; giving Precious the dignity she needs to survive and shows some real backbone in a character who could easily have been a clich�.

"Precious" is filled with disturbing imagery--incest and abuse--although when the going gets tough, mercifully, the screen often fades to black, but not always, and that is one of the strengths of the film. It doesn't back away from the real life horror of Precious's life. It's bleak yes, but compelling.

"Planet 51"

Richard's Review: 2 stars

"Planet 51" plays like it was written by a team of marketers. It is ripe with all the stuff adults think kids love. Cuddly aliens? Check. Slapstick humor? Check. A cute robot that kind of looks like WALL-E but not really? Check. Silly adult characters? Check. The only thing missing is a good story.

Set on an alien world where it rains rocks and the 1950s are in full bloom--imagine a high tech "Happy Days" and you get the idea of the look of the film--the story doesn't really take flight until dimwitted astronaut Charles T. Barker (voice of The Rock) lands, thinking he is on an uninhabited planet.

His plan is to plant an American flag, knock around some golf balls and return home a national hero.

Instead he discovers a planet full of "sea monkeys dancing to the oldies." Most of the green-skinned inhabitants of the planet don't quite know what to make of him either. The only knowledge they have of life from other planets comes from their sci fi movies. They believe he's a "humaniac" with two sets of teeth that has arrived on their planet to harvest their organs and turn the citizens of Planet 51 into zombies.

Barker becomes Public Alien Number One, the most wanted extraterrestrial on the planet. Then he meets Lem (voice of Justin Long), a friendly young Planet 51 astronomer, who may be his only chance to get back to his ship before the autopilot kicks in and returns to Earth without him.

"Planet 51" is aimed directly at ten-and-under crowd, who should enjoy the silly jokes and the colorful pictures, but parents beware, there's not much here for you. There is the odd throw-a-way line intended for the adults in the audience--a suppository joke and a "What the duck!" double entendre--which may raise a giggle but seem a little out of place when butted up against the kid friendly humor that makes up most of the movie.

The underlying message of tolerance, however, is a good one. It teaches kids that no matter how different we may be there is almost always some middle ground. As I say, good message, I just wish it were wrapped up in a better movie.

"Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans"

Richard's Review: 3 1/2 stars

By the time Nicolas Cage screeches, "Shoot him again! His soul is still dancing!" near the end of "Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans" his master class of extreme acting reaches its apex. This is the performance that Cage has been slowly working toward; a koo koo bananas performance that makes his demented work in "Knowing" look restrained.

But you know what? It works.

Set in post-Katrina New Orleans, Cage is Terence McDonagh, a good but wild cop who injures his back saving a drowning prisoner in a flooded jail. Soon he becomes addicted to pain killers, then coke, then anything that will ease his aching back.

When he can no longer easily get drugs from the evidence room at work for him and his prostitute girlfriend (Eva Mendes) he goes off the deep end, falling into an abyss of sex, drugs and gambling.

Throughout it all he works to solve the case of a family of murdered Senagalese immigrants. "Just because he likes to get high," says Stevie Pruit (Val Kilmer), "doesn't stop him being the po-lice."

"Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans" doesn't have the same operatic madness as Brian DePalma's "Scarface," it's too down and dirty for that, but it does have an unhinged quality that makes it the most surprising film of the year.

The police procedural portion of the story is fairly straightforward, but Cage's acting--which is as big as the 44 Magnum he has permanently wedged in his belt--and director Werner Herzog's surreal touches, like a hallucination scene complete with close-ups of iguanas, a Tom Jones soundtrack and a bug eyed Cage, make it a memorable experience.

Finding the tone of the film may be the most challenging part of finding enjoyment here. It's gritty and silly, but unlike the film it is very loosely based on, Abel Ferarra's cult classic "Bad Lieutenant," it doesn't take itself very seriously. That's not apparent at first, but when Cage physically abuses an elderly woman, shrieking, "I'm trying to be courteous but I'm beginning to think that's getting in the way of me being effective," while coked out of his mind, it becomes obvious that this is a satire of bad cop movies like "Narc" or "Training Day."

Seen as parody, the film's richness and don't-give-a-damn energy -- even if the plot points don't always add up -- make it one of the more unusual and entertaining movies of the year.