For a relatively young man, Ken Tarr has experienced more sorrow than many can imagine.
“I have lost my whole family to suicide,” says the Sydney, N.S. man, who is speaking out publicly for the first time on his devastating loss.
Tarr’s heartache began in September 2012, when one of his adult twin sons died by suicide.
“He was being treated through mental health, and two days before he took his life, he was given a prescription for medication, which he took. He took it all that day,” Tarr said, adding that shortly after his son died by suicide.
A year later, Tarr and his wife were forced to deal with the loss of a second child. Tarr said, after seeking medical help, his son was discovered dead in a wooded area. He too, had died by suicide.
His sons were bullied as children and later dealt with addiction problems, Tarr said.
Wracked with grief and unable to cope with the pain of losing her two boys, Tarr’s wife Cheryl died by suicide last March. She was 53.
“I believe she couldn’t carry on without her boys,” Tarr said, his voice cracking with emotion. “It was the only thing she had looked forward to her whole life -- she wanted to be a mother.”
Tarr is speaking publicly about the deaths in his family, in the hopes that his story will reach others who have been touched by suicide, and let them know they are not alone.
Over the weekend, walks and events were held in Canada to mark World Suicide Prevention Day.
In Halifax and Sydney, demonstrators walked to remember family members and friends they have lost to suicide.
“I love that people are talking about this issue and creating connections and saving lives,” said Laurel Walker, who co-ordinated the walk in Halifax.
Many individuals affected by suicide said that the medical help currently available for people suffering from suicidal thoughts is severely lacking.
Fran Morrison, who co-ordinated the awareness walk in Sydney, N.S., says members of the medical community working in crisis centres are not treating suicidal thoughts “the same way” they would treat urgent medical matters such as as a heart attack or stroke.
“If a person goes in saying they want to kill themselves, it may not be a stroke that’s going to kill them, it’s their own hand, but it’s still a life and death situation,” Morrison said.
Tarr says he hopes that by speaking out, he is helping others. He vowed to keep fighting to have better medical help in place people in situations like his family faced.
“I’m so glad that I had the time that I did with my family, and I will remember them forever.”
With a report by CTV Atlantic’s Kyle Moore
