Nudging your roommates about money owed every time you see them in the kitchen or living room can get increasingly awkward. And it gets worse when you run out of ideas on how to remind them without being curt. For many young adults, sharing an apartment can help divide the responsibilities and keep a lid on expenses. But that can turn into a burden if roommates slack on bill payments or don’t respect common spaces. While hiccups in shared homes are inevitable, experts say setting boundaries and expectations about how to handle them ahead of time can help maintain cordial relationships. The challenge for many, however, is finding the right moment to start the conversation. Bruce Sellery, CEO of Credit Canada, says new roommates should talk before they move in, or ideally, before even deciding to live together. He suggested framing it as an expectations meeting to set the tone, which will come in handy if a crisis erupts. “The hidden benefit is you’ve got something to refer back to,” he said. Understanding each other A prompt or activity, such as taking an online quiz about roommate compatibility, could help get the conversation started, said Lucianna Adragna, vice-president of client segments, everyday banking at RBC. Talking about your own money habits first can also make the other person more comfortable. But keep judgements out of the conversation, Adragna said. “It’s trying to understand how each other’s expectations may be different before starting to share expenses.” Then ease into details such as which costs they consider shared versus personal, and whether they follow a budget. Have a clear understanding of how bills will be divided, when they will be paid and whether the split will be equal, Adragna said. For example, a roommate might pay a larger portion of the rent because they have a bigger room. You should also figure out what’s not going to be shared or split, such as groceries, furniture or streaming services. Plan what would happen if one person isn’t able to pay rent one month or if an appliance breaks. “It seems sort of nitty-gritty details,” Adragna said. “But this is where knowing this before you move in is so much more comfortable than having those surprise conversations afterwards.” Sellery said the discussions shouldn’t just include financial priorities but also some intangible things, such as values. For instance, if he were moving in with roommates, Sellery said he would let his roommates know of his value around leftover food. “If I’ve got leftovers in the fridge, you do not turf my leftovers, you don’t eat my leftovers ... which is kind of quirky and other people might not have that same value,” he said. Set expectations Similarly, cleaning can become a source of discord among roommates. Sellery said that can be resolved with money, for instance, if all housemates agree to pitch in for a cleaner once every few weeks. That way, he said, “You get what you need, which is floors you can eat off. And I get what I need, which is not to do it myself because I hate doing it.” Expense-splitting apps can come in handy for roommates to track expenses and settle bills periodically, Adragna said. Many of them even send automatic reminders so roommates don’t have to nudge each other. “It helps with some of that awkwardness and it helps take some of the pressure off somebody who feels like, ‘Hey, how come I’m the one making sure everything gets paid on time?’” Adragna said. When setting expectations, Sellery said the principles should be clarity and predictability. And communication should continue long after everyone has settled into the space and set house rules, whether that’s meeting every few weeks to talk things through or just hanging out together on a Friday night. “It doesn’t have to be a big deal, because you want a no- or low-drama place to sleep at night,” Sellery said. “There’s enough drama in the world, there’s enough in people’s jobs, so how can you communicate your way through such that there’s as little drama as possible in your home life?” This report by The Canadian Press was first published Sept. 28, 2026. Ritika Dubey, The Canadian Press
