Tibetan Canadians say video of Dalai Lama kissing boy taken out of context

Dalai Lama apologizes for comment made to child The Dalai Lama has apologized after kissing a young boy and then asking the child to 'suck' his tongue.

Members of the Tibetan diaspora across Canada say a viral video that shows the Dalai Lama asking a boy to suck his tongue has been misinterpreted and represented in Western countries as more menacing than it is.

The video was filmed at a public gathering in February at the Tsuglakhang temple in the northern Indian town of Dharamsala, where the exiled 87-year-old Tibetan leader lives.

He was taking questions from the audience when the boy asked for a hug.

In the video, the Dalai Lama speaks to the boy for a moment, hugs him and kisses him on the lips. Then, he tells the boy to suck his tongue, which he sticks out for a few seconds, prompting laughter from the audience.

The footage triggered a backlash online, with social media users condemning the spiritual leader's behaviour as inappropriate and disturbing. The video surfaced again after the Dalai Lama issued a statement last Monday explaining he often "teases people he meets" in the manner shown in the video, and apologizing for any harm his actions caused the boy and his family.

However, Tibetan Canadians and supporters of the Dalai Lama in Canada say the video has been taken out of context by a largely Western audience that lacks an understanding of Tibetan cultural customs.

"The recent allegations against His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama are deeply concerning to us," the Tibetan Women's Association of Ontario told CTVNews.ca in an emailed statement.

"We believe that the incident has been misconstrued due to a lack of cultural and contextual references. While we recognize that the interaction may appear inappropriate to those who are unfamiliar with Tibetan ways of expressing affection, humour and teasing, we firmly believe that the interaction was motivated by compassion and love, with no intention to cause harm."

In another email to CTVNews.ca, the Tibetan Association of Alberta (TAA) explained that to stick one's tongue out carries a different meaning in Tibet, where the Dalai Lama was born in 1935 and lived until he was exiled to India by the Chinese Government in 1959, than it does in North American and European countries.

"Sticking one's tongue out is a form of greeting and respect in our tradition, as touching the forehead and nose are also gestures of love and greetings, just as every culture has its own way of showing respect, greetings and loving gestures," a statement from the association reads.

According to a 2014 essay published in the University of California Berkley's e-journal Cross-currents: East Asian History and Culture Review, the tradition began in the ninth century, during the reign of an unpopular king called Lang Darma, who was known for his black tongue.

Tibetans believe the king must have been reborn after his death, so to prove they weren't the king, they would show their tongues. The greeting has evolved into a show of respect.

While the greeting doesn't normally involve tongue-sucking, the TAA interprets the gesture as a prank or joke consistent with the Tibetan leader's "humorous and fun-poking manner."

"His Holiness the Dalai Lama has always been a jovial and playful person," the TAA statement reads. "His Holiness, an octogenarian, kisses the child and touches his forehead in a very playful way, teasing the kid to touch his tongue."

Pema Rigzin is president of the Tibetan Cultural Society of Vancouver, and he's met the Dalai Lama on several occasions. He was also born and raised in Tibet, before moving to India and, eventually, relocating to Canada. He said another gesture shown in the video – a kiss on the lips between an adult and a child – which has drawn criticism is also more common in Tibetan culture than in the West.

"It's very normal in the Tibetan culture that grandparents give kisses or even chew food for the little ones," Rigzin said in a phone interview with CTVNews.ca.

Having lived in both Canada and Tibet, Rigzin said he's noticed some key differences in the way people interact with each other in the two societies. Compared to Tibet, where he said families are large and intimate and individuals are expressive and "socialistic," Rigzin said Canadians tend to be more reserved and individualistic.

These comparisons, he said, demonstrate some of the ways Canadians and Tibetans are socialized differently and might interpret gestures differently.

"Sometimes if it's just an everyday thing, you don't think that is something you're doing wrong or that you're not supposed to do it," he said. "It just comes so naturally and then suddenly somebody points it out and says, 'Hey you're not supposed to do that.'"

In an interview with Tibetan news outlet Voice of Tibet following the event, the boy, who is not named, described meeting the Dalai Lama as "a really good experience overall."

"It was amazing meeting His Holiness," he said. "It's a really nice feeling meeting him and you get a lot of that positive energy."