Weighing whether to divorce in 2026? Taking these steps now may lessen some money stress

Married couples who may be close to calling it quits often decide to get through the holidays with family before taking actions to separate or file for divorce. (simarik/iStockphoto/Getty Images via CNN Newsource)

This holiday season may be filled with the usual delights and stresses of buying gifts, hosting and seeing extended family. But for some married couples, it also is a time of stress because they’re contemplating whether to divorce in the new year.

One study from the University of Washington found that March is a peak month for divorce filings. And two divorce attorneys told CNN they see a surge of new clients coming in as early as January inquiring about next steps.

“They are waiting for the holidays to be over,” said Kristen Shearin, a North Carolina-based divorce litigator, mediator and certified divorce financial analyst.

Given how financially fraught splitting up is, couples considering divorce might take a few steps now to prepare for what will happen if they do call it quits. Among them:

1. Learn about your state’s divorce laws

“Every state is different in terms of how they deal with separation and divorce,” said Lina Guillen, a divorce attorney who wrote the book Divorce and Money for NOLO, a publisher of plain-English legal information.

They may differ, for instance, in what defines grounds for divorce and what defines separation. And they will govern how long you must be separated before finalizing a divorce, as well as how assets and debts may be split.

NOLO has a state-by-state breakdown here. But you also might consider paying for an hour of time with a well-regarded local family law attorney or experienced divorce mediator to learn more, Guillen said.

Shearin suggested the same, noting that “there may be nuances that could make your situation very different from what you’re reading online. And you may not be objective about what you’re reading.”

If you already have a prenuptial agreement, it can inform a lot about how assets, debts and alimony may be handled in a divorce. But it won’t necessarily override all state marital laws – for instance, if the pre-nup terms were not mutually negotiated and are considered to be highly unfair to one spouse.

2. Understand how separation affects your financial rights

Typically, all assets acquired during a marriage are jointly owned by both spouses (eg, income, investments, stock options, homes, etc.) Each spouse’s property acquisition rights, however, end on the couple’s “date of separation,” which in most states means when there is a complete and final break in the marriage, Guillen said.

So if you’re both still deciding whether you can make the marriage work but want time apart, you might instead do a trial separation because it won’t stop the clock on the marriage. “None of your financial rights will be impacted,” she said.

Even though it’s not a permanent separation, where one or both spouses have already decided the marriage is over, she nevertheless recommends a couple draft and sign an agreement that clearly indicates it’s just a “trial” separation. It should include the term of when the separation will begin and end as well as what goals you have for that period (eg, evaluate our marriage, go to therapy, etc.). Also include a statement about how money will be handled during the trial period – such as how joint bills will be paid.

3. Gather your financial documents

Even for couples who stay married, both spouses should be aware of their assets and liabilities on a regular basis. But it will be essential to have a full view of the marital estate if you do decide to divorce, because each spouse will need to financially disclose all assets, income and debts to their respective divorce attorney, or other divorce professional they hire.

Shearin, who serves as the director of education for the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts, recommends compiling for yourself in one place — preferably in a digital cloud file — bank, retirement and brokerage account statements; mortgage documents; home appraisals; credit card statements; at least three years of tax returns; loan documents (eg, car and student loans); pay stubs; employment contracts; and insurance policies (eg, life, home, auto and health).

Doing this before the divorce process starts “prevents surprises and makes you better prepared,” she said.

And it can save money, she added, because if you email documents separately or incompletely or fail to send some, “the divorce professional who charges by the hour will charge you to follow up and download each one. If you have everything ready to go, it’s more efficient and less expensive.”

4. Draft a post-divorce budget

Divorcing can be expensive for both parties — and not just because of legal bills.

Before you move ahead, consider realistically what it will cost you and your spouse to live apart. “Most families spend what they make. And now they have to support two households,” Shearin said.

If you need help, a financial adviser can help you estimate income, housing costs, insurance changes, child-related expenses and the lifestyle adjustments that may be needed.

“It helps you understand your financial needs before negotiations begin,” she said. “Until you understand all the pieces, you won’t be able to move forward in a way that’s proactive.”

5. Don’t make big money moves

You typically will be advised not to move large amounts of money out of joint accounts, take on new debts or buy or sell property.

Legally and financially, “changes to finances before filing can backfire,” Shearin said.

For instance, in California, Guillen said, if you make changes, especially without informing your spouse, you could be found to have breached your fiduciary duty. That duty requires you, among other things, to be transparent about finances, make financial decisions with your spouse’s best interest in mind and not to misappropriate assets.

And don’t sign anything pertaining to your joint assets and debts without getting legal advice, Shearin added.

6. Create a new email account

If you think you will get divorced, create a new email account for yourself and don’t share your password. This is where you will keep privileged attorney communications, divorce-related document storage and scheduling throughout the process, Shearin said. “It keeps all divorce-related communication separate, organized, and searchable — and reduces emotional triggers from seeing divorce emails in your everyday inbox.”

By Jeanne Sahadi, CNN