'You have to be persistent': The right — and wrong — ways to network when looking for a job

A person has coffee at Granville Island in Vancouver on July 20, 2022. (Darryl Dyck / The Canadian Press)

One student had reached 49 “coffee chats” — brief meetings with industry contacts — with nothing to show for it.

He was ready to give up, said Karen Jackson-Cox, executive director of the Career Advancement Centre at Queen’s University's Smith School of Business. “He’s like, ‘I’m done. This networking thing does not work.’”

But they booked one more — his 50th meeting.

The industry contact didn’t have any job openings for him — but a colleague just down the hall needed a specific skill set. They walked over to another office and this colleague was, in fact, a hiring manager for a unique role, the kind that doesn’t show up on job sites.

“And long story short, that became an interview and job offer,” Jackson-Cox said. “Right on the spot.”

It is estimated that 70 to 80 per cent of available jobs are never posted, she added — they are roles filled internally or through networking. If young job seekers are not prioritizing networking, they are missing the vast majority of opportunities.

“So you have to be prepared,” Jackson-Cox said. “You have to be persistent. And you have to be professional.”

Networking is stressful for many, the introverted and inexperienced alike, but it’s a skill like any other.

A tracking document can keep the process methodical and organized with potential contacts, outreach and followups, Jackson-Cox said.

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For in-person networking, her students have practice sessions circulating a room and learning to ask questions and talk about themselves.

"I think it’s important to realize that this takes time,” Jackson-Cox said. “And you have to be intentional, because networking is about building genuine relationships that align with your goals.”

Lori Stephenson, founder of career coaching firm My Big Sky in Burlington, Ont., helps students from late high school through university and into the job search.

To start, job seekers should dip back into their school contacts; ideally they engaged with their instructors in class or during office hours, Stephenson said.

“I think we forget, once we’ve graduated, that we’re alumni from our school,” Stephenson said, “so you can go back to those supports. There’ll be job postings, there will be career resources, and ideally (students) are doing that before they leave.”

The next phase includes connecting with everyone you know, she said, including coaches and past employers from summer jobs, family friends and neighbours, camp counsellors and mentors.

The following step moves into the industry aligned with your education and career goals. Take a research approach, Stephenson said — ask questions and learn, don’t just say you’re looking for work.

“It’s about having a reason why you want to connect with somebody, not just to build the numbers, but to better understand the type of work they do,” Stephenson said. “It’s not, ‘Will you hire me?’ — it’s a different lens. When we think of networking, we might think about somebody who’s hiring, but that limits the conversation.”

Go to industry conferences and job fairs, join clubs and associations, go to events with a friend, make manageable goals such as “I’m going to meet three people,” Stephenson said. Focus the conversation on asking questions and getting advice — people love giving advice, she added — but be ready to answer the big question: “Tell me about yourself.”

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“And the answer, by the way, is not just, ‘I'm looking for a job,’” she said. “The answer is, ‘I’d like to connect with you because I see that you have graduated from the same program.’”

Many people struggle with talking about themselves, Jackson-Cox admitted. But again — it’s a skill that requires preparation and practice. Even though you will plan these details about yourself, keep a back-and-forth going, she added. You don’t want to deliver a staged pitch that feels over-rehearsed.

“It's got to be a two-way conversation with the other person,” Jackson-Cox said.

“Because, again, you’re trying to get insights from that person, and to be very curious about their career and what’s happening in their companies and their industries.”

Business cards are still relevant for swapping contacts, Jackson-Cox added, even as digital options gain ground. At a busy event, recruiters might slip your business card into a specific pocket if you’ve impressed them — right pocket versus left might be how they remember you later.

LinkedIn remains a staple for online networking, and take advantage of groups such as professional associations, alumni groups, special interest organizations and cultural groups, Jackson-Cox said. Other platforms such as Instagram and TikTok may also be necessary if your industry is dominant on them.

Although the youngest job-seeking generation is likely savvy about cleaning up their public social profiles for any prospective employers — yes, they will Google you — Jackson-Cox said she still sees some people running into trouble from connections.

“So you might not write, and you might not have a picture, of something inappropriate on your profile, but someone else might have … interacted with you, so you’re being pulled into their socials,” she said. “So from social to social, you know? You’re vulnerable to other people’s decisions and choices as well.”

But don’t hide online either, Stephenson said. It’s important to have an accessible presence that makes sense for your long-term goals. Even though you want a job sooner rather than later, networking efforts can last your whole career.

“I think the term ‘networking’ creates a level of stress in people,” Stephenson said, “either because of the social aspect, or we’re proclaimed introverts. Instead of calling it ‘networking,’ it’s about building connection. It’s about really investing in those relationships, and starting small with people, and building from there.”

This report by The Canadian Press was first published Aug. 6, 2024.